Your complete guide to vaginal trainer (dilator) use: sizing, instructions, and tips.
Reviewed by Ladibug's Medical Advisory Board
What are vaginal trainers (dilators)?
Also commonly referred to as a vaginal dilators, vaginal trainers are a smooth, tube-shaped device that you insert into your vagina to expand, stretch and relax your pelvic floor muscles. They come in gradually increasing sizes so you can progress the stretching process comfortably over time.
Trainers (dilators) can be helpful for people experiencing a wide variety of conditions and symptoms. These include (but aren’t limited to!):
- People experiencing pain with penetrative sex (dyspareunia)
- People living with vaginal muscle spasms (vaginismus)
- People transitioning through menopause and/or recovering from cancer treatment
- Individuals who are recovering from genital gender affirmation surgery (aka “bottom” surgery)
How to choose the right trainer for you?
Not all trainers (dilators) are the same, so please take extra care when shopping for them (i.e. if you want to read more about the concerns with buying trainers from Amazon - check out our Substack article). You should look for:
- Medical grade silicone (safe, non-toxic and easy to clean) - don’t worry, Ladibug ONLY stocks medical grade silicone
- A graduated set with multiple sizes - so you can start with a comfortable size and work towards larger sizes
- Flexible yet firm materials for comfort and effectiveness: we love trainers that have silicone covering over a rigid internal base
- Compatibility with water-based lubricants!
What size should you get?
Most people begin with the smallest size in a gradual trainer(dilator) set to gently build comfort and confidence over time.
A helpful guide:
- If you are new to trainers or experience pain with any type of insertion, start with smallest size or set
- If you’ve had penetrative sex or pelvic exams recently, you may feel comfortable with a medium-sized trainer or set. The medium set can also be helpful if you’re hoping to improve your tolerance for pelvic exams.
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A medium-sized trainer is comparable to the average size of a penis, while larger sets reflect sizes closer to a larger penis. If you don’t engage in sex with people with penises, you may not need the larger set, unless that is your preference.
Step by step: how to use a trainer
1. Wash your trainer before every use (see below on 'how to clean your trainer')
Always wash your trainer before every use, even if it's brand new out of the box. Wash your hands and trainer with gentle, non-fragranced soap.
2. Choose a calm, private space
Find a quiet, comfortable place where you can relax. Make sure you won’t be interrupted.
3. Start with the right size
Begin with the smallest trainer in your set, unless your provider suggests otherwise. You should never feel forced to use a size that causes pain.
4. Use water-based lubrication
Apply a generous amount of water-based lubricant to both the trainer and your vaginal opening. This reduces friction and helps with comfort. (Avoid silicone-based lube with silicone trainer.)
5. Get into a comfortable position
Lie on your back with your knees bent, or lie on your side with one leg slightly forward. Whatever feels most natural to you. Have pillows nearby to use as props to support your legs so you can relax fully.
6. Breathe and relax your pelvic floor
Before insertion, take a few deep breaths. Try to consciously relax your pelvic floor—imagine your muscles softening or “melting” downward.
7. Gently insert the trainer
Hold the trainer like a tampon. Gently guide it into your vagina at a slight angle pointing toward your lower back, only going as far as is comfortable. It should not be painful. If it is, stop, try a smaller size, or take more time to relax.
8. Hold and breathe
Keep the trainer in place for 15 minutes, or as recommended by your provider. Some light movement (gentle in/out or rotation) may be advised, but avoid any force.
9. Remove slowly
When you're ready, gently remove the trainer. Take a moment to rest and acknowledge your progress—it’s okay to go slowly.
10. Progressing to a larger trainer
Once you can insert your trainer without pain, progress to the larger size. Repeat 3 times a week.
How do I clean my trainers?
- Wash your trainer with warm, running water and a hypoallergenic, fragrance-free soap before and after each use. Rinse thoroughly to remove any residue, then pat dry with a clean towel, or allow it to air dry
- Store it in a clean, dry pouch or container—ideally the one it came with.
- Avoid using harsh cleaners, alcohol, or antibacterial soaps, and only boil or sanitize it if the manufacturer specifically says it’s safe.
- Proper cleaning helps prevent irritation and infection, keeping your trainer safe and ready for use.
- After every use, urinate to flush out your urethra. It’s like peeing after sex: even if you don’t have much to empty, this is a helpful post-session practice.
Always use your vaginal trainer under the guidance of your doctor, pelvic floor therapist, or other healthcare professional—they can help you choose the right size, create a safe routine, and support you through each step of the process.
Shop all trainers and water-based lubricants at Ladibug— we only carry trusted brands that meet our high standards for quality and safety!